Gumption!

I was a lazy kid. No, I was a conflict-avoidant kid, too afraid to take on things that seemed "hard" because I feared failure. So, you know, a normal person. I changed my college major to writing because it came easily to me, whereas biology and art took more work (and frank talent) than I thought I could muster. Years later, I found it harder to slog through unrewarding and soul-chipping things (jobs, relationships, cleaning the grout) than just making a change or sucking it up.

I have a spreadsheet of every guy I've ever dated. It helped me see patterns--like repeatedly picking unavailable men (the adamant bachelor, the workaholics, the guy who moved continents every six years, the guy who couldn't express an emotion if it set him on fire, the pretentious whiny twit who had no room for anyone else's issues because he couldn't shut up about about his own perceived problems and the general stupidity of everyone else). Another pattern, I suppose, is my own bewildered judgment and tendency to rationalize the unpleasant until it hurt.

Where was I? Oh, patterns. They are tracings of the past, not roadmaps for the future. 

You can do more than you think you can. Unless you are pretentious and inept, of course. But you are probably neither because your are here, and therefore you are curious and insightful.